What kind of prison?

So, I'm always talking about how cool it is to have a teenager. How you can relate to them, do fun stuff, avoid watching the same inane program 50 times in a row. Stuff like that.

Well, at some point the teenager bill comes due. Teenagers are fun, but the stakes are just a wee bit high. Your little one messes up and they skin a knee. Your teenager messes up and you are a grandfather or getting them out of prison.

.....speaking of prison, Landon has a girlfriend. When I heard this, I calmly asked Dawn and Landon about her. They said it was one of the football managers and told me which one. "Cool" I said, as all my dealings with this young lady have been positive and she seems very nice. Dawn then switched to a tone that she often uses when she wants to tell me we're overdrawn or that we need a new car.

"Yes, she is very nice, but there are a few issues at home. She's being raised by her mom because her dad's in prison".

"Oh"

I honestly didn't know where to take it beyond "oh". I mean, I shouldn't think worse of this kid because her dad screwed up. Furthermore, I don't know whether this is tax evasion or whether this guy cut someone up and set the parts on fire. However, when it's your kid, every stereotype and worry you can have comes out and comes out quick. While leaving the "oh" hanging in the air, the real me is thinking:

"She's gonna get pregnant because she's looking for male attention"

"This low-life prison dude is going to try to suck off of Landon's athletic future"

"I'm going to turn around and this guy is going to have Landon jumped in to his gang"

(as an aside, why are there gangs in Harrisonburg VA????????)

Not that I'm proud of any of this inner dialogue, that's just what rolls through your mind when it's YOUR kid. Not very progressive, but this is my kid; not a court of law or human resources.

Dawn made my night complete when she said I should have a talk with him. About what? He hasn't done anything. Actually nobody's done anything except apparently this girl's dad. Should the talk go something like "Landon, avoid any gang this guy is in while keeping this girl from roping you in to getting her pregnant. Also check for signs of crack....you know how it is. Oh, since we're in a rural setting, check for meth as well; can't be too careful. Anyway, I love you and trust you, no matter how many progeny of incarcerated felons you date. Need anything to drink?"

Well, maybe I can join the rival gang......just in case I need backup.